Wednesday night at the NPG:



What happened to my brother?

At Shoreditch Park prom, on Friday night in the rain:



Sometimes, I don't even know why I bother...

On the tube to Moorgate (a snatch of clear conversation caught between the carriage rattling):



Fella to his mate: "......he's loose. Really loose..."

Friday night, 21 bus from Monument:


Text 1 (to Greg): Darling. Hi. I'm sorry. will call you when home
Text 2 (to Greg): Je t'aime

On the 76 bus from Moorgate to Dalston Friday night:



A group of sixth-form kid-clubbers board: Yay! We're going to a marvellous party.

Wednesday at Tower 42*:



Person 1: You think Messi can take Ronaldo?
Person 2: Did you see him in those shorts?
Person 3: Ronaldo has such a small dick.

*Barcelona 2-MU 0

Thursday night at Eurostar, St. Pancras:


Englishman : I hear that it may be a hot summer.
Englishlady: Mmm. We may need to get some sort of air conditioning-plenty of water.

At Maze, Saturday lunchtime:


Guy 1: Mmm, that is good
Guy 2: Like an expensive Gaucho don't you think?
Guy 1: I'd quite like a Gaucho; the cowboy, not the steak.

Tuesday on Central line, Chancery Lane to Bond St:


Girl to friend: It was really small. Really small.
Friend gives girl knowing look...

On the 76 bus from Kingsland Road to Old St, Friday night:


Raver girl, on mobile: I don't want to get too wasted tonight. I'm saving that for tomorrow.

Saturday night at the Barbican:


Old man to old lady: Doesn't it feel like summer yet [sic]

At the Diner, Friday night:



Hoxton indie boy in tight red T: This is so not life at all

Saturday night at Pizza Express:


Mother: Don't you know I'll be there?
Amanda: Whenever you need me? Jesus, plastic sounding Jackson shit mother.

Friday night at NOBU:

Middle aged guy to his young Asian companion: I prefer a slice to a snip.
Young Asian guy to his middle aged companion: We* only have another 50 minutes.

*I might have misheard, it could have been you only have another 50 minutes....

Tuesday night at the Northgate, N1:



Lady 1: They'll be moving around trying to avoid the troubles
Lady 2: I just don't want to give into that stuff.

Friday 13th, in Tower 42:


Woman to a lover: Is it worth it? A new winter coat and shoes for the wife...
Lover to a wife: And a bicycle on the boy's birthday?

Sunday on the Eurostar, Paris to London (23 mins out of Paris)




French Guy to English BF: All things he ever wished are left behind
English BF to French Guy: The talks he never had and grown-up places he never went...
French Guy to English BF: C'est tragique!

Friday night, at the pub (Cheshire Cheese):



Guy 1: Ouch, I'm gonna be your bruise!
Guy 2: Fcuk off.

Thursday night, St. JOHN Restaurant, Smithfield:



Katie: Feels like I've been outside myself for so long.
Scott: We'll miss you, Katie.

Monday, at lunch in Gaucho Grill (Smithfield Market):



Man 1: We all get it in the end.
Man 2: Yes, we do.
Man 1: I rather like it in the end... Do you like the beef?