Wednesday at Tower 42*:



Person 1: You think Messi can take Ronaldo?
Person 2: Did you see him in those shorts?
Person 3: Ronaldo has such a small dick.

*Barcelona 2-MU 0

Thursday night at Eurostar, St. Pancras:


Englishman : I hear that it may be a hot summer.
Englishlady: Mmm. We may need to get some sort of air conditioning-plenty of water.

At Maze, Saturday lunchtime:


Guy 1: Mmm, that is good
Guy 2: Like an expensive Gaucho don't you think?
Guy 1: I'd quite like a Gaucho; the cowboy, not the steak.

Tuesday on Central line, Chancery Lane to Bond St:


Girl to friend: It was really small. Really small.
Friend gives girl knowing look...

On the 76 bus from Kingsland Road to Old St, Friday night:


Raver girl, on mobile: I don't want to get too wasted tonight. I'm saving that for tomorrow.

Saturday night at the Barbican:


Old man to old lady: Doesn't it feel like summer yet [sic]